I’m Scared. And Confused. And Distrustful.

I don’t know what to do next on this health journey.

Food addiction is real. And I’m currently not making any headway on breaking mine.

I don’t have what people would normally call an “eating disorder.” But what I’m learning is that most of us truly do have a food addiction. And we can’t help it. In the name of capitalism, our whole food system in the US is stacked against us, from addictive substances being added to packaged foods en masse, to the horrors of massive slaughter houses, to fresh produce being the most costly purchase in a grocery store.

It’s a sad, sorry state of affairs. And my belly pays the price. (Not to mention my self-worth and overall physical health.) Continue reading “I’m Scared. And Confused. And Distrustful.”

My 6-Day Fast (Day 3)

This blows. And as it turns out, I’m a stubborn motherF’er.

This is hard.

Today I wanted ALL the food. I caught myself staring longingly into the refrigerator. At raw ground beef. Eggs. Condiments. Vegetables. Cheese. Even miso paste. I wanted it all. Continue reading “My 6-Day Fast (Day 3)”

My 6-Day Fast (Day 2)

It was a good day…why do I feel suspicious?

Woman must be the pioneer in this turning inward for strength.
In a sense she has always been the pioneer.  – Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Knock on wood, today was a relatively easy day. I have gotten used to a few random stomach grumblings by now and it simply reminds me to drink more Snake Juice and be grateful that I am finding the fortitude somewhere somehow to push through. In days gone by I would sprint to the fridge or the cupboard, because a rumbling stomach meant, YAY!, time to eat (usually whatever I wanted).  I LOVE to eat. I can spend hours planning, obsessing, making lists, saving pins, perusing cookbooks, prepping, chopping, cooking, and so on and so forth. My addiction isn’t just to the food substance, it’s to the whole experience. Continue reading “My 6-Day Fast (Day 2)”